It’s in the amount of attention that I pay to criticism,
In the rate at which negative comments sink in,
Just the thought of voicing my thoughts in a group gets my heart racing,
It’s in how much I worry about what the next person is gonna think or say,
Just hearing those things feels like a bee’s sting,
It lies in the fear of speaking my mind even though I know that it is right,
The power I render to my pen and paper….
It’s like I could write about anything at all that I wish I could share confidently,
I want it to go away so bad,
I want my heart to keep beating normally anytime I think of saying something in a group,
I want my hands to stop sweating and shaking the way they do,
I want that fear to stop raging in my gut,
I wanna speak my mind without giving a damn about what the next person is gonna say or think…
God knows I try so hard not to have an emotional reaction to everything being said about me,
All I want is to stop being sensitive to nay sayers.